Sisters

"I am the middle of 3 girls. My mom had the three of us before my eldest sister turned 3. My eldest sister was the "good" girl;, my youngest sister was the typical baby and I was the "bad" child of the family. None of us have ever really gotten along. We were never what you could call friends. We fought throughout our teenage years and as we moved into adulthood the seperation between us just grew greater.

I married and had two children. Neither of my sister married or had children until 3 years ago when my eldest sister married the man who had been in and out of her life for 15 years. I was not invited to the wedding. Due to a rather extreme disagreement we had had years before on how I was raising my children ( I wasn't doing it right!) we broke off ties and although I have tried to reconcile with her, she has wanted no part of me. When I visited Victoria this past summer, she refused to see me, saying if I wasn't willing to rehash the past (which I see no point in doing, it can't be changed) she didn't want anything to do with me.

On Thursday my mom, who is visiting my sister in Victoria, called twice during the evening. I wasn't home. She called back Friday morning. I had thought that something was wrong as my mom never calls, well hardly ever, especially when she is staying at my sister's. I call her, though not there, because of how rudely I am treated every time I do call my sister's house. Anyway, my mom was calling me to tell me my eldest sister had been diagnosed with breast cancer.

I don't know what to do. I don't know whether to call, send a card, write a letter or pretend that nothing has happened. Every time I have made ovatures of friendship, they have been rebuffed. Would this time be any different? Will facing her own immortality make my sister realize that one can't live in the past, that right now is all we have?" I whisper.

Are you listening?