Thursday, September 28, 2006


"My mom called today. I told her that Sarah was having bad stomach pains and was going to the hospital to get it checked out. While we were talking Sarah left a message saying that they had taken her right into emergency and would we please come. I called mom back to let her know and my eldest sister, the one with breast cancer answered. I was almost in tears and I asked her to please relay the information to mom. There was a long pause and then she said,"No-one asked me my opinion." I asked her about what. She said "I think Sarah should have had an abortion." I said that Sarah had worked all through that and had made her decision. My sister repeated "She should have had an abortion." I told her that I didn't need this right now and would she please let mom know. I then hung up. Mom called later and I asked her if she had heard the conversation, she said no, but that my sister had told her. I said that she had had no right to say what she did and my mom said that it was my sister's opinion and she did have a right to say it to me. So my question is 'does a person have the right to always state their opinion, no matter what the situation or how hurtful it might be?" I whisper.

Are you listening?

Saturday, September 23, 2006


"I am a cat lover, I admit it unabashedly. For those of you who also love cats, I stumbled across two sites today that are filled with pictures of cats. The first, Cats in Sinks is exactly what it says, pictures of all kinds of cats in all kinds of sinks. The other site, Kitten War, has you choosing which cat out of a pair is cutest. Both are great time wasters, but heh, they are cats!

SamMolly These are my babies. Sam is very laid back but Molly is a bit of a monkey. She gets into a lot of mischief. Sometimes though Sam can act up too, but I always think that Molly is the ringleader! Sam is on the left and Molly is on the right. They bring a lot of joy to our house. I can't imagine a home without a cat." I whisper.

Are you listening?

Friday, September 22, 2006

Women in Black Peace Vigil

"Today we held our second successful peace vigil. By successful, I mean more then me turned up!!!!The previous two only I was there, and as I have been told not to stand alone, I didn't. But today 2 other women joined me, Debi and Claudette. I had notified the local paper about our event and they sent a photographer. I will be interested in seeing if we actually make it into the paper. We had a number of cars honk and wave, well the driver's of the cars did. In one car a young man stuck his head out of the window and barked at us the entire time they were stopped at the red light. That was the only negative incident. The best part of the hour though, was when two men from Iraq stopped and said thank you to us for protesting the war, then a local Quaker stopped to tell us how happy he was to see us out protesting. It made me feel like we are doing something right. Maybe more people will be inspired to stand with us." I whisper.

Are you listening?

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

More Quotes

"Here are some more quotes I have found on my way from one place to another.

"Weapons, however highly decorated, are instruments of destruction. The wise man will have nothing to do with them."

"Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired, and success achieved."
~Helen Keller

"The people of the world having once been deceived, suspect deceit in truth itself."

"The longer I live the more I see that I am never wrong about anything, and that all the pains that I have so humbly taken to verify my notions have only wasted my time."
~George Bernard Shaw

"And the day came when the risk it took to remain tight inside the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom"
~ Anais Nin ~

"Grace is that invisible numinous assistance that takes us a step beyond the limits of our intellect and will. It is in us but has a life of its own, ruled by forces that we cannot comprehend and that we are not in charge of. Something, we know not what, is always at work doing, we know not how, just what it takes to follow the trajectory of our destiny of wholeness."
~David Richo

"The Utility of Non-Existence
Though thirty spokes may form the wheel,
it is the hole within the hub
which gives the wheel utility.
It is not the clay the potter throws,
which gives the pot its usefulness,
but the space within the shape,
from which the pot is made.
Without a door,
the room cannot be entered,
and without windows it is dark.
Such is the utility of non-existence."
~Lao Tzu

"I once had a rose named after me and I was very flattered. But I was not pleased to read the description in the catalogue: no good in a bed, but fine up against a wall."
~Eleanor Roosevelt

"We shape clay into a pot.
But it is the emptiness inside
that holds whatever we want."
~Tao Te Ching

"Fate shuffles the cards and we play."
~Arthur Schopenhauer (1788-1860); German Philosopher

"People should not fear there Governments, Governments should fear their people-Every government degenerates when trusted to the rulers of the people alone. The people themselves, therefore, are its only safe depositories."
~Thomas Jefferson: Notes on Virginia

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails."
Explore. Dream. Discover."
~Mark Twain

"Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new."
~Albert Einstein

"Time and trouble will tame an advanced young woman, but an advanced old woman is uncontrollable by any earthly force."
~Dorothy Sayers

And my very favourite quote is:

"Another world is not only possible, she is on her way. On a quiet day, I can hear her breathing. "
~Arundhati Roy, Porto Alegre, Brazil, January 27, 2003

Hope you enjoy these" I whisper.

Are you listening?

Monday, September 18, 2006


"I am the middle of 3 girls. My mom had the three of us before my eldest sister turned 3. My eldest sister was the "good" girl;, my youngest sister was the typical baby and I was the "bad" child of the family. None of us have ever really gotten along. We were never what you could call friends. We fought throughout our teenage years and as we moved into adulthood the seperation between us just grew greater.

I married and had two children. Neither of my sister married or had children until 3 years ago when my eldest sister married the man who had been in and out of her life for 15 years. I was not invited to the wedding. Due to a rather extreme disagreement we had had years before on how I was raising my children ( I wasn't doing it right!) we broke off ties and although I have tried to reconcile with her, she has wanted no part of me. When I visited Victoria this past summer, she refused to see me, saying if I wasn't willing to rehash the past (which I see no point in doing, it can't be changed) she didn't want anything to do with me.

On Thursday my mom, who is visiting my sister in Victoria, called twice during the evening. I wasn't home. She called back Friday morning. I had thought that something was wrong as my mom never calls, well hardly ever, especially when she is staying at my sister's. I call her, though not there, because of how rudely I am treated every time I do call my sister's house. Anyway, my mom was calling me to tell me my eldest sister had been diagnosed with breast cancer.

I don't know what to do. I don't know whether to call, send a card, write a letter or pretend that nothing has happened. Every time I have made ovatures of friendship, they have been rebuffed. Would this time be any different? Will facing her own immortality make my sister realize that one can't live in the past, that right now is all we have?" I whisper.

Are you listening?

Thursday, September 14, 2006

Immigrant Women

"Last night, my friend Gwen and I attended an English Class for immigrant women that we are volunteering with. We had women from Korea, Libya and Iran. One of the volunteers is a university student from Japan. They are a wonderful group of women who are bravely learning to navigate not only a new country but a new language. They come from a variety of backgrounds but all are sincere in their efforts to learn and adapt to their new homeland.

Two of the women had their babies with them, one was teething and didn't want to leave mommy for the babysitter, the other is a beautiful little three month old girl. Maybe next week the babysitter will actually be able to take care of the children! She had a good time, meeting and talking with the ladies, even if she didn't fullfill her purpose for being there.

We worked on grammer, learning "will" and "would" and then we talked about what we had done during the summer. It was interesting hearing everyone's stories, expressed in different levels of english, but all completely understandable.

The highlight of the evening for me was when a Korean woman noticed the henna dyed fingertips of a woman from Libya. She got so excited and between the two of them they discovered women in both countries use henna and dye their nails the same way. They were so excited to have something in common. If all contact between people of different cultures could be so peaceful and and end with both peoples having discovered a common bond between themselves." I whisper.

Are you listening?

Wednesday, September 13, 2006


"Sometimes it seems that nothing can go right. Everything, one after another goes wrong, is screwed up or falls apart. I have a friend, at least I think of her as a friend, where something seems to be a problem. I don't know what it is but something has changed in our relationship. I don't know what I've done that makes her unfriendly towards me, not wanting to do things with me, not answering my emails, barely talking when we see each other. I am afraid to ask her because that will bring the problem right out into the open and then there is no going back. Does that make sense? Maybe if we pretend nothing has happened then we can go back to being friends? I miss her and her friendship as she is a great person, funny, loyal, tough and sincere. Maybe she will read this and recognise herself and be willing to meet me halfway." I whisper.

Are you listening?

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Rumour or Truth

"My friend Faradeh is back from her trip to Iran with her son. She had a good visit, seeing her family and her husband. I asked her how it was there, with the tension between Iran and America, with the war between Israel and Lebanon. She says that things are calm, people are good. She told me how with the cost of oil going up, Iran has more money and is investing it in things like new highways and other infastructure in cities around Iran. She talked about how Iran supported Lebanon(not Hezballoh) with money and arms. Then she surprised me by saying that the United States is planning on, after some future war, dividing Iran into 5 different countries. I wonder where this comes from? Is that what people there are taught? Is there any basis in reality for this belief? What would the American government say? What would our government say?" I whisper.

Are you listening?

Monday, September 11, 2006


"I am sure that most people at some point today found themselves answering that question "where were you when?" I was in bed asleep. I was woken by my son saying "mom, something really bad has happened." My daughter hadn't realized it was real. In her early morning brain fog, she thought the same movie was playing on all the channels. I sat there watching CNN, in stunned shock, barely able to comprehend that this was real. That someone, somewhere had found a new and shocking way to kill people and frighten an entire planet. To this day I cannot understand what motivates such hatred and rage. I don't understand the desire to kill in order to win or prove your point.

I did not watch tv today. I don't need to watch images or hear names read or watch people cry in order to remember. What I will do instead is stand in vigil next Friday, and every other Friday, on the street corner with other women who want an end to this seemingly unending wave of death that sweeps across our world in the name of religion or country or values. We will stand there with our signs calling for an end to war, to hatred, to violence. We will stand, as other women around the world do, and hope that everyone, everywhere, will hear our silent cries for peace instead of hatred and that someday we will no longer need to stand.

Saturday, September 09, 2006


"You know what they say, "The best laid plans of mice and men go oft astray", well that sure sums up this past week. I had the best of intention when it came to my blog last Saturday and then Sunday came along! I found out that I am going to be a grandmother. My daughter, who moved home "just till she could find a place" is pregnant. So here we are, my partner and I were looking forward to having the place to ourselves, fixing up the downstairs into a room for a train and having our own life and pow! we get this. Now that we have adjusted to it we are okay, but the first couple of days were really hard.

We have offered her the option of staying with us until she finishes college, which will be two years. She has accepted and today was spent rearranging furniture to accomidate her needs and ours. My office, where I type this, will become the train room with one corner for me and my computor. She will take the bedroom downstairs for her and the baby when it gets here.

The young man who is the other half of this equation is having a hard time dealing with it. I have never seen anyone look so stunned in my life. "It wasn't suppose to happen" and "we took precautions" was his response. Like I told him, when is it suppose to happen? It just happens when it happens. Life has a way of finding a way. I don't know what his role will be in the future, but for now he is still around, trying to find his way.

Furniture is so much easier to rearrange than lives." I whisper.

Are you listening?

Saturday, September 02, 2006


"I function best when things run smoothly, I know what is happening well in advance and I can do things at my own pace. Well for the past month none of this has been true, my whole life has been disrupted by bad tenants, children moving out and back, money problems for my daughter and therefore for us (when do you stop being a parent?) and now my fibromyalgia is really acting up and I am not able to do the things I want when I want. One of the things I have let slip is my blogging. I usually like to do it at night, when the house is quiet and I am winding down for the day. These nights I am exhausted and in bed by 10. The fibro makes me so tired that at times it feels like I don't have the energy even to breath. So I guess if I want to blog I will have to do it during the day, so here I am! I think I will clean up my links on my blog today, update my book list (it is waaaay out of date) and then plan some future blogs. I like to have things to write about, not just ramble, plus if I get some ideas, when my mind doesn't want to work there they will be, waiting for me." I whisper.

Are you listening?